Real lemmings don't actually commit mass suicide that is actually a myth. A Lemming is a cute rodent...wait I'm not writting about Lemmings I'm writing about the other Lemmings. You know the follow the leader lemmings. If one person thinks its cool, 3 more think its cool then 9 then 18 then ALOT. This whole Lemming thing has been rampant for quite some time. It all started with trends and blew out of epic proportions.
It has come to my attention that teen girls (and some female adults) in particular suffer from this Lemming ailment. Males have always liked the same crap for centuries (Sports...modes of transportation...world domination etc) but females just keep surprizing the world. The amount of stupid trends today is very very disturbing. I could make a list of many things but I will stick to 3. Justin Beiber, Twilight and Dramatic Reality TV shows.
I had no clue who the heck Justin Beiber was when I first heard about him. When I heard one of his songs I thought a girl was singing. I didn't think too much about it, I mean its just some kid that a bunch of teen girls adore right? Oh was I ever so off with my calculations. The thing with most teen girls is they MUST have common interests with other teen girls. If they don't they are deemed losers (Kinda like my master the social Highschool outcast when she was a teen). So Twitter exploded with Beiber fanatics, alot of these fanatics have Thousands of followers all because they LOVE Justin Beiber. "OMG you love him too!!! I am so following you we can like share lyrics and stuff". Beiber fans take over twitter trends very frequently. A girl named Sydney Dalton trended two whole days at #1 all because she posted a video of her and her girl friends tearing down JB posters. The hate mail that girl got was just crazy, the insults and even video threats all over a bunch of stupid posters. If one girl disses JB the whole JB community bands together like an army and attacks. Can you say unfairly out numbered? Its also getting worse not better...but many of us sane people (and dragons) are just praying this ends soon. But what will be the next trend? I'm too scared to think about it.
Twilight...RUINED VAMPIRES AND WEREWOLVES! Vampires DO NOT sparkle, they are allergic to the sun, and for goodness sake there is nothing romantic about vampires. They are blood thirsty creatures. If one seduces you in an alley way your simply a snack. Vampires were completely bad ass until Twilight came along and then all sorts of teen girls and some adult women became Edward obsessed. Or Jacob obsessed. I have news for all these girls. Edward and Jacob DO NOT EXIST! You will not be swept off your feet by the perfect charming handsome man you will end up with a guy who belches, smells funny and farts alot and ignores you when the Xbox is on. But theres just something about perfectly mysterious romantic guys that just trap girls in a fantasy world. I'm on Team Lestat because Lestat is bad ass. Edward is not a real vampire. Jacob is a loser and Twihards are VERY annoying. There is nothing more annoying than going to a movie theater and hearing girls go all giddy over a Twilight poster. Also If Stephanie Meyer Ever makes a book about friendly dragons that sparkle in the sun light I will end my life.
Which brings me to the Doody on TV. Where do I even start? We don't have cable which is great. The game consoles take over the TV anyways and the only time we actually watch something online is if it's a hockey game or something really funny. But I still have to listen to people go nuts over The Hills, Glee, Jersey Shore, Vampire Diaries, etc. Gleeks? I mean come on the people on that show cant even sing...I saw 5 minutes of an episode and cringed in fear. The Hills scared me more. 5 minutes of that pointless crap was enough for me to want to throw either the TV out the window or Masters friend out the window. No Master was not watching the show she has standards and would rather waste her time on Facebook or reading an actual book. But one does not even have to watch The Hills to be surrounded by it. The pratts are fame whores, LC is constantly in every magazine, and they even write news paper articles about them...I'm not safe anywhere! Jersey Shore on the other hand is by far the most ridiculous crap on TV I saw a preview and began to cry. What the hell is the world comming to and why does this Doody occupy television, Trend on Twitter and end up in the news? WHYYY???? Better yet Im concerned for those who enjoy this crap. Oh yes thats right LEMMINGS! Because when all the ladies go out to ladies night to watch Sex In The City on the big screen they happily have something in common...those stupid shows.
So Men...beware. And keep up the good work of not being a Lemming. Please keep discussing sports because sports are REAL and feel free to play your Xbox, play it well. It\ll be the only stuff that keeps you sane when your girlfriend tries to discuss her Doody with you. If your fortunate enough not to have a Lemming as your significant other give your self a pat on the back. You did well. As for me I shall be found cowering in my cave because I am terrified of what's to come next. Yes even Dragons have fears. Beware the Lemmings!
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